I Want A Monthly Allowance

All those plans that I made for myself
I've got nobody else to lean on
Gone so far with my head in the clouds
Now it's time to come down and be gone
Downtown Saturday
In a better way
Than I ever was before
Don't need anyone
Standing in my sun
Don't need that anymore

- Find My Way, The Gabe Dixon Band.

I bought my first romance novel when I was 12, without realizing it contained streaks of romance in it. It was called Seven Tears Into The Sea by Terri Farley and the book is currently sitting idly in my bookshelf. If there is one thing I remember most about the book is how I asked Li Teng who has the book, what the book was about besides it being a story about fantasies and myths. Li Teng said something about how boring it is because it was about romance but she has to finish it because she has a principle of finishing books when she starts reading one.


I didn't want to finish the book because it was awfully descriptive and I didn't give a damn about fictional romance when real life is tangible and waiting. The only sane explanation I can come up with is that my imagination and mind wasn't as clouded with romantic fantasies as it is now. I wonder what happened through the course of these 4 years.


I stopped reading the book eventually because I couldn't take no more. I picked it up again a year later because Li Teng's principle about having to finish a book has always been nagging me inside. I started reading it again, expecting no significant difference in it. What I unwillingly realized was that I had a whole new perspective for the book after finding myself halfway through it. I wanted to know if Jesse (the male character) ends up with Gwen (the female character). I wanted Jesse to do something or anything romantic with Gwen.


Yesterday I was looking at my bookshelf for the umpteenth time, something I do when I can't sleep. I ran through the slightly yellowed pages and noticed that the book was not awfully descriptive or long-winded at all. It was what a good fantasy book should be, a good amount of exposition and illumination. I thought I loathed it, but I ended up loving it. How contradictory can a person be? This, unfortunately, cannot be said when it comes to liking someone. You either click or don't.


On another note, I found my favorite song of all time! Or, at least - it ought to be my favorite song! It's called Find My Way by The Gabe Dixon Band. It's featured as the smashing opening song in The Proposal. I read the genre and it says "indie" and I couldn't laugh any louder because whoever who labeled them "indie" clearly doesn't have a lucid mind, or have not heard indie music before. I remember telling someone that indie music gives me headaches (though a fraction of them are worth listening to) and the person said a-matter-of-factly, "Indian music? No wonder. I hate it too, it's just so disgusting." What is the world coming to?! I get very worked up when it comes to misunderstandings.

I'd like to think that The Gabe Dixon Band are more towards old school rock, like the Jets. I started singing the song every morning because it's damn uplifting. The opening of the song is jovial enough to serve as your Red Bull for the day.

See, I shit you not.